Prereq for being on nyc prep: money, bitchy, and a lazy eye... if only you were rich
How sober do you have to be to donate blood?
remind me not to fuck anymore half bald 20 year olds. because obviously there's attachment issues
Still had my bottle opener ring on. Started to give him a hand job. LOL
There is soup leaking out of my nose nothing in life has prepared me for this moment
I dunno. The only plans I have for sure after finals are smoking a bowl and eating a 5 pound gummy bear. btw I bought a 5 pound gummy bear
winnie the pooh came out of nowhere and offered me a burrito...it was a fucking amazing burrito.
Either I'm paranoid or I swear my parents rigged my house so you can never sneak in or have the munchies without being loud.
Keep it up. It gets easier when you turn 21. Something happens in people's brains when they turn 21 and all of a sudden you have the power to drink constantly and abuse drugs and still graduate with good grades and your shit together. Im almost positive I read it in my freshman year bio textbook
I've decided he is effectively a mouth, hands and cock held together by bad ideas and compliments, and I'm OK with that.
I apparently used the line "I'm a bouncer too so i would know if I were too drunk" then they asked me to leave.
SCUSE ME I KNOW YOU DIDNT DO THAT MUCH COKE IN 10 MINUTES
Eh, I don't question what my penis likes. It just does what it does.
When a guy asks for your ig but you already know his blood type, social security number, & mother's maiden name.
Stop trying to mix nacho cheese and sex. Guys don’t want hot cheese near their junk. Pick a better fetish
Randomize
