we have officially mastered the walk of shame
So...i'm having a drinking contest, my right hand vs my left, i have a feeling the 24 pack is gonna win
with your vagina and my liver, anything is possible
i just got drunk dialed and its 10am. clearly finals are over.
Just did an upsidedown spineboard shot. Gotta love lifeguard parties.
he stopped midthrust to put on his sex playlist and the first song was 'can you feel the love tonight'
where do you find these guys?
That birthday blow job you ordered came in the mail today. I suggest you hurry home.
Should I be concerned you put your last name in my phone as "danger"?
I definitely don't remember licking the drag queens boob.
if you come you're not allowed to wear pants. if you arrive wearing pants you won't be wearing them long.
I wonder if go pro can customize a cock ring so I don't have to hold the camera anymore
I think it's getting serious, we started a jigsaw puzzle together.
I wish people could trade lives with me for a day so they could see how much better my life is compared to theirs
Just saw a girl I banged wearing a pro life shirt downtown. Not sure where to start with that.
The blunt fell in the hottub, i mean i knew she was upset but i didnt expect her to dive for it and come up balling her eyes out...
Randomize
