Like my Aunt Merial always says ... big dicks, big dicks.
just survived the first fart of the relationship.
I just found glass in my funny face pancakes, there's nothing funny about that.
So let me get this straight. You would sleep with an uncircumcised guy whose name you didn't know, but you won't try the new shrimp taco from taco bell?
this is no time to have dignity 4/20 is coming
He just kept pointing to each of us saying "arrested, arrested, arrested"
she's a kindergarten teacher now. The teacher desks are the perfect height for fucking. I'm delaying the break up a few weeks.
I looked up while we were having sex to see him covering my pillow pet's eyes with his free hand. I think I'm in love
No, he went to go get condoms. The least I could do was chug two beers before he got back
i finally decided to cut him off after he he looked me dead in the eyes and said "how have i been inside you for the past twenty minutes when my pants are still on?"
On Friday, can we drink like its Civil Wars times and the doctor's coming to saw off our gangreen infected legs?
Maybe I can find a straight girl rehab camp, like the opposite of those degaying camps, where they teach me how to love the ladies instead
Omg. I would pay ALL OF THE MONEY for that camp.
No, I found out he was gay when I walked in on him blowing the guy from the dorm room next to ours.
So about that you can bill me for the chair but it was David's idea to jump from the window sill into the washer with "clothing pillows of cloudiness" to land on to get ahold of him you have to phone his mother
I just talked to her she really hates you like a lot
Is it weird that my mother is taking body shots off my gf after meeting once?
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