He quoted an N'sync song to confess his attraction to me. Needless to say, I had sex with him.
She just did a myspace photoshoot with her baby
My main thought on the Olympics: I need LESS cowbell.
Listen, i'm watching playoff hockey and eating waffles. i just don't have time for your drama today.
my mom just asked me why she found a half-eaten burrito in the hamper
Just a heads up, the coffee pot is filled with Jager.
Getting business cards printed for tonight. Would you rather be: 1. Vice President of Argentina 2. Celebrity Dental Assistant or 3. Dial-Up Internet Technician
3. Dial-Up Internet Technician.
Im so tired of dysfunctional exs fucking up my relationships with future dysfunctional exs
You were screaming across the bar "BUYING US SHOTS ISN'T GOING TO MAKE US STRAIGHT, YA KNOW!!!!!!!!"
sounds like it. if it makes you feel better i blew up a $75000 farm tractor last night.
We're pretty much just dating until one of our ex's wants us back
Well, you're 18 and dating a 28 year old. Who has a wife. Who isn't you. I would guess that's why your mom frowns upon the relationship.
Can I pee and smoke my bong at the same time or is that like eating on the toilet
There's a pregnant girl taking shots of apple juice
got the runs at the club last night. wondering when it'll be safe to show my face again.
Randomize
