***** fucked a guy with one hand last night
Want to have sex later?
This feels like a trap
So I heard you only slept with me because you were drunk...is that true?
That depends on who this is.
He tried to carry her to her room after she passed out, but when he picked her up she came back to, saw him, screamed rape and pulled out her vuvuzela app and blasting it like a rape whistle.
i just dedicated my kegstand to your breasts
Trying to grind with crutches was not a success
trapped on the roof of the strip club. help
Bartenders are not toys. I repeat, bartenders are not toys.
do you know where my other puke covered boot is
You told her that she shouldn't be allowed to wear clothes then when her roommate asked if you like her you said "no I just want to insert things into her"
I stand by it.
it's finals week and we've been blasting country porch drinkin since 10AM. there's been like 4 tweets about hearin us on the other side of campus
I was so high last night I honestly think my tears were medicinal
I feel like I lost a fight with an 800 lb gorilla made of tequila
Just got my LSAT score...if you need me I'll be drunk in a ditch somewhere.
is it still considered wake n bake if you wake up at 2 pm?
Randomize
