She got kicked off the plane and spent the last four hours in a holding cell with the feds.
but she's really nice
Remember that time I came into your room after taking a muscle relaxant and we argued about what state has the longest coastline?
Cops are here now. U need to come back. Ur not under arrest. But u need to apologize to the woman for what you did to her cat.
Dude, hurry and get over. I need a wingman. She is on her 6th vodka shot and her resident ugly friend is still sober
I was high enough to understand and function with 'flip' while playing brick breaker
Damn. I don't think I could ever be that high.
Have fun at school today. Try to hide that you're a whore. The other girls will like you better that way.
his mom walked in, looked at me, sighed n nsaid 'when are u gonna learn' n walked out
Whenever you get off. By "pick me up from work" I mean, "pick me up from a bar by work at your earliest convenience" :)
I ran into his family and they made me a ham sandwich and I asked if they wanted to come streaking. I felt they deserved the invite.
And it was in that moment when I realized that these high schoolers looked up to me and that I should set a good example. So I stole a casserole and left.
You should be able to leave recommendations on Tinder.
You cant use biscuit as a chaser
Definitely woke up.this morning to a random girls head in my toilet and her mom knocking on my door.
Btw, how did you break into my room, and why did you decide that covering the mushrooms with a blanket was more secure than a lock on my door?
What are you feeling right now?
Idk. I just flashed a porch 🤷🏼♀️
So not in the best place to do an emotional inventory
Randomize