Yea well when i pee it makes steam.
There comes a time in every man's life where he has to shit in a catbox to prove a point.
I wish i was in the wii world.
its like whenever the snow comes all the hott girls drop out of school. where are they
we're about an hour out, how's the weather?
cloudy with a chance of strippers and cocaine, you're favorite. welcome home.
No amount of marijuana is enough to justify blood on my ceiling
"too many" and "free shots" never belong in the same sentence
This is the most boring acid ever. I feel like a child. But thats okay, I've been a child before, its nothing new.
fucked a girl in Bentley hall at ten tonight, came on the carpet and I plan on doing it in another building soon. Watch where you walk
I don't know if I'm more excited about sex or that I have an excuse to smoke a cigarette
You said too many real things and now I need to crawl back inside my protective fort of sarcasm, being an asshole, and sass
He woke me up holding a gallon of apple juice and a shot glass...
Can we start referring to attractive men as "A fine piece of dick?"
Me and my dad hot boxed a hotel bathroom... That's what I call father son bonding
I've struck affair-gold. He's hot, he's ripped, he doesn't want a relationship, and most importantly he won't have to ask Gods permission to bang me like the last religious nut job did.
Randomize
