Sometimes I stick my finger in my own ass and pretend it’s a vagina. I think it’s kinda weird. What do you think?
I can no longer count the number of girls I've banged on my fingers and toes. It's like being born again.
that was the first time i tried it. why is it all sticky? its like somebody threw a glue bottle at my face.
you kept making us tell you how cute you looked in your new outfit, even after you threw up all over it
yup, got lost on my way to the final. maybe i should have gone to this class all semester
so how was last night?
got high and had our usual talk about the definition of cole slaw. then tried to call the ramen noodle company and convince them why my face should be on thier packages.
HOW DID U BEAT A GAY GUY IN GAY CHICKEN?
I'm taking her home. She just told a 90 yo woman in a packers hat to "suck her cock".
Dude, just look at these fucking curtains and chill out.
Pretty sure my body is in shock, I shouldn't feel this ok after last nite.
You just jumped of the couch and yelled "hidden tiger crouching dragon!" That's the answer to how you broke your finger.
I just watched some guy take a shot of jack Daniels, chase it with a shot of ciroc & then violently rip his pants off. You have to come here.
You don't realize how cold it really is...I poured my bong out the second floor window and icicles hit the ground.
*tries to be fun and flirty* *literally gets peed on*
How did I get the fat lip, while puking I may or may not have sneezed... Wacking my face into the toilet bowl...
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