Say something about gay babies.
the quote on the bathroom wall was "stop reading this and focus on peeing" and i realized i'd peed on the seat.
I'm playing a drinking game with nyc prep. This will not end well for meeee
Everytime the gay dude pretends he's not gay, drink a cosmo. Everytime the crosseyed girl is crosseyed, kill her
we're out of white wine, toilet paper and windex... too hard to explain via text
nutella sex= disaster
i got totally wasted at 2pm and cleaned the house bc i was bored. my mom now supports my alcohol problem
started her walk of shame as my mom and dad walked through my common room door...my dad held the door for her and told her to have a nice day
I'm starting to have hip problems from having my legs spread too often.
I think I just found part of a tooth on my bed... What goes on in here?
i lost his rear view mirror, your phone charger, and my lesbian virginity. 21 isn't shaping up too well so far.
I think I'm just gonna be a cat and wear slutty black clothes with some eyeliner on my face and pretend my ears got stolen by a drunk guy
I'm not judging you. Just know that you could be Queen of The World. Instead you're 5:28 p.m ponging. I hope you're at least winning
I won't trust your judgement until the word stripper doesn't make me laugh
Did you really get 12 corn dogs from the gas station last night?
Is constant horniness a medical condition? Because a husband, a boyfriend and an office side piece should be enough penis for one girl - but they’re not :-(
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