I mean a good dj is a huge turn on
i'm gonna start putting 34DD under other qualifications on my bartender applications and see if that helps
you know you were refereeing rock paper scissors for who got to make out with your sister right?
Its what jesus would do if there were bud light in his time. I feel obligated.
My passouts and memory loss are great training for when I have alzheimers. You'll know where to look when I get lost.
I just smoked my last bit of kief with a grill lighter. This is what crackheads must feel like.
This is no lauging matter. Huge cock equals great sex. Marriage to huge cock equals great life.
using blue streamers we found on the bathroom floor was probably not the best substitute for toilet paper.
We are not on the "bring me breakfast" level. He's bringing me penis if I ask for breakfast too I'll just sound greedy
Word of advice, don't put your jar if peanut butter in the microwave, blue fire comes out
No it's ok I've been talking to the girl at the Chinese restaurant about your dick for the last 20 minutes. I haven't mentioned your name but she thinks she knows you.
STONER SAFETY TIP: don't use the driver's side vanity mirror to check how red your eyes are while you're driving. it won't work. trust me.
You threw a handful of caps into a pitcher of Heineken and asked everyone if they wanted to go "bobbing for molly"
First of all she starred talking about God which immediately killed my buzz
Someone who makes you cum so hard that you have an asthma attack is clearly your soulmate
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