If that was your dad, he is hot
I want to take things slow emotionally, but fast physically
im pretty sure that there was a mint leaf in my poop this morning. i love mojito season.
it was great that she threw up because that made me the only one trying to hook up with her
I literally sat down and peed with my underwear still on. How does that happen?
I woke up with dick mouth, a raw vagina, an empty bottle of vodka and the best man next to me. I also found my thong by the pool. Best.Wedding.Ever.
they are using this drunk girl like a spin the bottle in the hot tub, whoever she lands on she makes out with.
And there I was, sitting Indian style on the kitchen floor, my fingers covered in peanut butter.
Why is Kyle using one of my nieces as a blunt object to provoke and attack my other niece?
Pencil dick carries the name proudly.
He told me to prepare for his "Jurassic cock" and I had to leave the room from laughing.
Molly was fun. I was in a captain planet onesie in Wal-Mart talking to everyone haha
I ended up sleeping with him in a public bathroom because neither of us remembered where we lived. I have hit a new low.
I’m going to Lewinsky this place
That makes no sense, but it sounds terrifying
There is way too much butt cleavage here for a formal event.
Randomize
