If facebook stalking was a job I would totally pown it
u sent me just one boob. one just doesnt do it for me. u dont get full on a half a rack of ribs u need a full one
I'm sorry you missed class, the topic today is copy and paste. I'm not even kidding.
Just because we buy weed together doesn't mean were a couple
you were passed out snoring, face down with all your clothes still on and 20 minutes later you sat up and said "FUCK YES" and then passed out again.
Thanks for convincing the hot dog guy to give me one for $1 after I drunkenly dropped the first one. I loved your reasoning "I know you mark that shit up! I work in retail!"
there are some nice people on this island. free ride free pancakes and they even prayed for us when they dropped us off
siamese drinking twins saturday is a go ... bring duct tape.
Seriously what kind of college town is this? Nobody parties during the week or abuses perscription drugs
Just got cockblocked by my GF's wedding shower... That's a first. And I have to buy a gift.
Just peed off a cliff while playing white snake on my phone. Close enough?
I’m not closing myself off the to the possibility of making a bad life choice.
You made noises. And kept meowing. I have a twenty minute phone call to prove it.
He's the douchy one who wouldn't let me rip his shirt off, right?
He answered the door stark naked. When I called him on it he shrugged and said 'casual Friday ' Some boys can't be trusted to work from home.
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