i would rim the shit out of meg ryan
Shes from jersey what did you expect her to say when you asked her if she did coke? Its like asking some1 from a third world country if they are hungry
you know how i said i wouldn't send that pic message of your lofted bed falling from you fucking a fat chick? that was after i sent it to your mom
I can't believe I'm wasting this thong on a guy in a sweater vest.
If there was a god I would have a big mac right now, but i don't
you really dont want me to drink and drive. you saw what i did to my face and that was only from walking
She is putting glow sticks from her bedroom to the bathroom. She is calling it 'Being prepared'. God help us all tonight...
Damn you and your Monday night power hours.
Dude. My cat just tried to bat the tampon string hanging from body. NOT COOL, SEYMOUR. NOT COOL.
How does she have a hairless cat and a husband it's not fair. Both are hard to come by
Look, sometimes you have to snapchat a topless photo of yourself in the middle of class just to prove you can. I can and I did. End of argument.
I know. In fairness he did tell me to throw up out his window onto his roof so I don't think he's pissed at me but I'm still mortified by the whole situation.
how much do I hate his dog? was just googling to see if you can rent a hungry eagle for the weekend hate.
Is it bad that we left the kid passed out on the bus? I think his name was texas. I was too drunk to be questioning this.
I’m calling dibs!
You can’t call dibs on dick. That’s free range dick. May the best vagina win!
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