You found a girl to hook up with at a gay bar?
No. His name was Paco. I didn't get it by choice. I never had a hickey before.
he is a creepy guy.
yea thats what heroine does to ppl.
I popped a zit on your vagina. Don't say I never loved you.
complete strangers are now referring to me as 'the bourbon guy.' i can live with this.
My nipple ring got caught on the rug again. Tequila makes me unlearn these things
ARE YOU GOING TO SACRIFICE YOUR LIFE FOR MCDONALDS HASHRBOWNS
no im not bringing booze its easy, you just challenge a drunk guy to beer pong, he'll hand you two beers, you lose on purpose, and everyone makes fun of you. but we laugh in the end for bringing nothing to a byob
I was so drugged up it was amazing, I felt like a dinosaur "because I enjoyed spinach, and I got apple juice and only dinosaurs get apple juice" according to me the day of, and last night I felt like a rocket ship
This is not a costume party, I'm just wearing fairy wings.
Of course you are.
I had to break it to her that she was not in fact behind the bushes when she peed on the church last night
This is stupid. I am not getting knocked up from fucking in his backseat behind a starbucks. I refuse.
...hi
YOU SHOULD BE ASHAMED OF YOURSELF
Ok cool I was afraid you'd never speak to me again. I can work with this.
Unless your name is actually "Ticfj" like my phone says, I have no idea who you are...
It was a crazy night: tears were shed, blood was spewed, and bottles were emptied.
People probably think I’m a fangirl bc I go to so many shows but it’s really bc I like fucking the tour manager
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