you need to know that there is a kid here wearing an i mosh for Jesus shirt
I hope the prosecutor is a dude cause my lawyer is hot.
Quiet hours sex sucks. I hate finals.
So I'm looking through your google history on your laptop and you have 'is ketchup even remotely nutritious' and 'alcohol with fewest calories but highest alcohol'. What new fad diet are you on because I feel like we could do this together.
I remember seeing LSAT prep books and thinking "Whose room is this? I should be hooking up with them instead."
No, you don't understand. If the words "stop," "alcohol poisoning," and "regret" aren't in the same sentence by the end of the night, I will have failed this birthday.
So we just left her at the hospital. She is not ruining my Monday night
he tried to give me his business card but gave me his health insurance card then realized it and offered to take me to the strip club
I want to lick his teeth again. Is that a creepy thing to say?
I'm eating those little wheels of cheese and watching storage wars, this is the opposite of sex.
You left your underwear in a sandwich bag on my kitchen counter.
it's ok, no one ever died fom being sticky.
i've gotta research that and get back to you.
After fooling around at the hotel til dawn, I managed to feed her with my free buffet passes. Tastes like sweet victory.
I feel like your personal Bdsm barbie...
i have pictures frm only 4 hours ago that will fucking ruin you so i suggest yuo come get me.
Where are you?
dunno. ask mike. bring pain killers. and underwear. and my dignity.
Randomize
