I woke up at 11 this morning in my car parked in front of the bar.
I know, I tried to wake you up, but I couldnt. So I walked home
Fuck?...well quicky, i have to study...unless you can read my book while i bang you, then it can last four chapters
I can be that talented
She had to leave early so she could get ready for her high school's homecoming. I hope her date likes sloppy seconds.
I never thought I'd say this, but there is a life threatening amount of rumpleminz in our freezer
did she really put a helmet on, try to make a hole in the wall then pass out on the floor ten minutes later? if thats true ill be there in 15
Welp. I just hopped out of his window to avoid meeting his parents... happy monday!
Legitimate concern. Who am I going to have birthday sex with?
By the way seagulls wings are very soft. And the lesbian and or by sexual twins say hello. Be home in the little bit time frame.
The fact that I took a nap during my midterm shows exactly how I handle being an adult
Where are you in relation to the mariatchi band?
Well I'm over here squandering a fabulous hair day and radiant complexion
I don't think I have face palmed that many times in such a short period. And I've worked tech support.
It feels like heartburn in my lungs. I'll buy 2 pounds.
He’s definitely circumcised. There’s not enough room in those speedos for a foreskin with that fire hose he’s packing.
Get your heels and tits on! I’m not wasting a Brazilian because his fucking kid ate paste or Legos and ruined an afternoon suite sex and room service
Randomize
