yes i saw that this morning. it was my mailbox.
I have two girls sleeping in my bed naked and I ended up making it to class, what were you saying about staying in on the weekdays?
I just saw a girl make a shank with the underwire in her bra...
Who would have thought google would have HELPED me fail a test...not pass...thank you pacman, thank you google....
So I'm looking through your google history on your laptop and you have 'is ketchup even remotely nutritious' and 'alcohol with fewest calories but highest alcohol'. What new fad diet are you on because I feel like we could do this together.
the girl walking home behind me started yelling and pointing "i want an ass like hers!" i feel vaguely accomplished.
Of course I lose my iPhone but still manage to hold on to the ruler for my dirty teacher costume
Come over so we can hookup and eat tacos. Those are 2 things you can't possibly turn down.
Sorry, they don't make maternity Power Ranger suits...
I know everybody has skeletons in their closet but why are all of mine so slutty?
Just got our of the shower. I'm standing naked in front of my open windows cause fuck my neighbors that's why
blew off easter dinner with the fam to go play shot roulette. woke up in nothing but my boxers in the back of a random pickup truck.
Dude my doctor just legit got down on her knees and loudly begged me to do my pap smear
He deserves someone who will touch his penis at 3 a.m.
I used an emoji to tell him I was pregnant. I should feel bad about that, right?
Randomize
