Like my Aunt Merial always says ... big dicks, big dicks.
Omg Kevin Jonas is engaged!!!!!!
Omg really? To who. Gay marriage is only legal in like 3 states.
woke up in a shopping cart using a keystone box as a blanket. how was your night?
hanging on that rope, lady gaga looks exactly like a used tampon
all i know is that if they can hide that much blood in her outfit, they definitely could have hid a penis
It wasn't until that morning that I realized I wasn't actually dreaming, finding myself in the bathtub with someone laying on me
Apparently i just threw up in the bathroom, i told them i just blew my nose. i don't think they believe me...
Did you spray paint that captain morgan fifth that's in the freezer gold?
Once two people had broken bones it had become a bulk hospital trip so we took the party bus
I was ready to fuck him until he pulled the "I might be bi curious" card. Now its turned into a guilt fuck. It's like he's a 3rd world child in need of a sexual orientation.
Just found a note from Saturday that says "rainy soft hair".... Any ideas?
I just took a shower and found half a cookie melted under my boob. Please tell me there's a reason
I feel like every picture I upload of him on facebook where you can see his purity ring, I should make the caption "something in this picture does not belong"
Do you understand how hard it is to go down on a guy underwater? Didn't think so....
Also this just in, I think you could see my sequins underwear that say unwrap me through my leggings all day while I hung out with his family
Dude whoeverrs house this is has only creeam cheese and beer in the fridge. Thats my kinda diet
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