Im at strip club and am horny
Oh please, I could turn a Vienna Boys Choir concert into a shit show
The drink u got me is pineapple something w. Cigarete ashes in it.ima drink it anyway
the lady in the checkout infront of me had a case of beer, two 40 oz, and activia...really??i dont' think irregularity is her problem
I'm not sure which is worse. The fact that I slept with him last night, or the fact that you did too.
...She was shooting whiskey using a turkey baster...i was horrified.
On the plus side I got to ride in a fire truck and I didn't have to blow anybody for it
All i'm saying is it doesn't matter how drunk you were, at 26 years of age you should always remember to take down you pants before you shit in the toilet
Well on a lighter note, I had sex in a food truck.
my dad is now demonstrating how to start a fire with a tampon. happy fucking new year!
Currently at a fetish club with a set of swings (don't ask). Having flashbacks to the park by my house
I just formed the "shit on a tree in Chicago club." And I feel awful about it.
Dude is PACKING. And yes I am holding up a cross and holy water and hissing like a pissed off goose.
Buying drug test kits off amazon. And qualifying for amazonSmile donation to a kids hospital feels wrong and funny at the same time xD
Omg. I meet up with you guys with bodily fluids on my chin ONE time and suddenly I'm a whore.
Randomize