he showed me his boner with his cell phone light during the movie.
nothing like a negative hiv test and a bag of condoms to brighten my day.
Yes, i finally made it. but let me tell you...i can smell myself right now in class right now, this scent is called alcoholism.
You're in the clear; you and Andrew did not joint fingerbang that girl on the dance floor last night.
I'm having flashbacks from last night. Did I admit to pausing Whitney's funeral because I was watching porn? I believe I did.
I am the girl who goes to bed with her make-up on so that she doesn't have to fully redo it in the morning. I am obviously not ready to be a mother.
How does that even work?
just really comprehended the fact that I'm getting high at the same place I used to play as a child. the nostalgia and thc is mixing together in one, intense wave. WHO HAVE I BECOME
I may or may not have pissed on my floor last night
Welcome to 22
What! You have to go to class. Otherwise, you're wasting money that could have been spent on weed. Gotta get that shit in perspective.
Watching the Walking Dead, snuggled up naked, and drinking a beer. No better way.
If ever there was a tweet to describe your life, it's this.
You are the only person I know who has a fierce hatred for a five year old. Not even five year olds in general, yours is very specific
He managed to rip my nipple last night....
ICE CREAM AND CAKE BITCHESSSSSS
So I lost my dignity between the strip club and your penis...
In celebration of finishing my homework, lets drink tea w/ vodka
Randomize
