is it odd that your cat looks tougher than you?
I had never watched a guy jack off to me before, but let me tell you, it was a very uncomfortable experience.
Took it a bit far last night. While leaving his house, I sent myself a text that said, 'you're still pretty"
I found bruises on my neck from barfing out the window.
Oh god I think I promised some guy from high school that I'd be his fuck buddy in like 3 months
BTW. If I show up really drunk and dressed a cowboy, don't be alarmed
Adderal just makes me love life. I want to do so much. I just can't stop thinking about all the wonderful opportunities we have and how lucky we are and I want to make a difference in the world. I just have to reign in my brain and convince it that changing the world starts with a college degree, which depends on studying for these finals.
Dude, you chugged an entire bottle of tomato sauce and got us free drinks for the night. No way was I gonna stop you.
You're more than welcome to join us! There's red velvet cake and apparently my pants are open for business I didn't consent to this
Packing a mid day bowl in the Sonic parking lot. Have I gone too stoner?
Topless Tuesday? One of us will be really happy the other not so much.
As long as he continues to be our subleaser and continues to fuck me, I think it's acceptable for me to steal a piece of bread here and there.
Knowing there are different types of spiders in different countries and regions makes me never want to travel.
Tonights mission: get trashed, smoke a bowl on top of the silo, get some dick. Not necessarily in that order.
I tried making my own red bull with crushed up caffeine pills, bubbley water and flintstones chewable vitamins. The ER doctor sead I'm lucky to be alive.
Randomize
