He finally told me that he's married. I guess it doesn't really matter.
I just feng shui'd our living room furniture. You may be mad in the morning
Going back to my hometown to drink absinthe with highschool boys. Remind me to evaluate this decision tomorrow.
so i had a hang over on saturday and i stayed in the shower for 4 hours, then crawled out, skimpered to my bed, and some kid i didnt know was sleeping in it
win or lose for butler, i'm still masturbating to brad stevens tonight
I just did the nutritional comparison between 2% milk and Bud Light Lime.. the beer had less calories, less carbs, and less fat. It's not looking good for milk in my life anymore
Sharon took in a random bleeding stranger drunker than her, named her Nicole, and is feeding her jello shots on the toilet
The port-a-pottys are knocked over so I have nowhere to sleep.
You're mold. I may or maynot have puked blood this morning.
He threw up, and left his credit card next to the puddle. He kept on saying he wanted to pay for the damages.
sooo I am sorta kinda using your name as my stripper stage name.
Would you have sex with a guy wearing a Batman mask?
It's all hypothetical, I don't have a Batman mask... yet...
And that's why we do second round interviews for possible roommates.
I thought I would be a proper lady and put my spare panties in a ziplock
Longest 30 seconds of my life
10/10 so not recommended
Randomize
