I just googled how to quit your job and cause a big uproar at the same time....i tell you how tomorrow goes, i'm so excited....
ha so i just found a picture of you eating paper towels and many of Laura freaking out from it.
I woke up with a picture of my dick as my background. still wondering if it was a good night or not.
I'll come out for a little. I can't be visibly hungover at work again or I get written up and fired. And yes, I am aware of how alcoholic that sounds.
I'm sorry that I ate boneless ribs off of your sister, but that is no reason to drink my alcohol.
Do you think if you have sex with a girl twin, her twin brother feels it to? Woke up at her house and they both have a look of disappointment on their faces.
He seems to have a lot of things figured out and most of the answers involve bourbon
Stop giving guys blow jobs because you're no good and it's messing up my sex life. Word gets around & then they think it's me and don't believe me when I say I have a twin. Learn to stuck dick right.
Getting my nails done with Diana... I'm going for the keep your friends close and the girl who's dating the guy you want to fuck closer
This breakup hit defcon 5. Walked to pathmark with a denim jacket over my nightgown to get ben and jerrys. On sale btw.
Seriously you've eaten pizza pockets for every meal for the past 4 days
Well to be fair I wasn't alive for breakfast 2 out of 4 days
I feel like your dick pick is everywhere. Never have I needed to be so careful when posting pictures.
Update: That guy is no longer in the restroom, so he's probably not dead.
If you find me in the bathroom in a fetal position, licking frozen bacon .. I might have Drank a little too much.
it was awkward when he was taking off my clothes and i had to help him undo my fanny pack
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