Are you dead
Yes
Oh man
Someone fed me too many chicken nuggets and sexed me too hard
my grand plan for the evening is to do shots of vodka til i cant anymore
I'm just sayin. Is it sad that I spent my last dollar on a hamburger just to get a paper bag to huff out of?
I don't know what part of vegas I'm in but its definately the wrong part
I took a shit in your bathtub. Nothings off limits
Printing the vagina inspector badge was money well spent.
That's the girl I met who was peeing on the driveway with me. We bonded
I just saw that blonde chick you wanna bang rolling down the hall wearing a Thor mask..
Wow. We're meant to be..
So you're on like a list there now..."Do not under any circumstances give this person a knife. Serve them in plastic cups ONLY"
Idk I was embarrassed that I hit it too hard so I played it off by spitting out bong water like a 'whales blowhole'
Why put me through the conflicting battle of being happy for your vagina but sad for my vagina for no reason ahole
I woke to him laying in the floor puking in a shoe. So I guess we had a good night.
Just had sex in the room next to my parents. Heading back to school ASAP.
He wants to buy us a microwave. Clearly the man is going to fix my life.
tell raye i said hi and sorry for bleeding on the limes
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