ive been sending my husband naked pics of my whole body from my phone..its a work phone. do you think our boss can see? if so, im either getting fired, or a raise.
dude im shwasted, kabul is not the best place for this
sitting in class between the roommates of the two girls i fucked over break. this feels like a bad version of wife swap
dude you cant keep breaking into my house just to raid my fridge.. especially at 3AM.
She insisted on fucking on the futon mattress on the floor, answered the phone call from her boyfriend who was on his way to pick her up, and then had the audacity to ask if I was clean
i had to take off my light up shamrock necklaces, my professor was getting suspicious.
He took a shot, then proceeded to puke into the bucket he was iceing his broken foot in
They left me stranded on the side of the road with a table and five gallons of water. They said it was all I really needed to survive. People are staring
Dude if i sent you a picture of the inside of my fridge would you be able to break down and explain everything that was in it?
why does CNN give a flying $@*# about the royal baby so, so much?
i hope they name him Joffrey
I'm going to bed early so football can come sooner
Just bought condoms with a walmart gift card. Thanks grandma.
Let's drink tonight I promise I'll make it out of the house
Let's celebrate our country being screwed by screwing.
Had sex outside for the third time last night. Mosquito bites all over my ass, and i think i have a rash on my nipples. When will i learn.
Just wait till winter
Randomize
