I just spent $27 on things to pee on.
worms taste like bacon by the way.
I always wondered what they tasted like.
watching E! true Hollywood story: curse of the lottery.. i'd probably spend all my money on blow and airplanes too..
who loves string cheese????? I LOVE STRING CHEESE!!!
you know...if you didn't give such great head little things like this would ruin our friends with benefits relationship.
Am I allowed to say that I would really enjoy blowing you again? Or does that fall into the "nothing changes between us" catagory?
We are not in the same countries and I heard about your hook up last night BEFORE you.
I finally looked at the pictures from last night thanks for feeding me and pulling my pants up
How was the birthday sex?
Shit got outta hand. Honestly I think even my STDs have STDs.
Doing the walk of shame at 1 AM. Stumbled across a rave. This night is epic.
We got a noise complaint for vacuuming too much but not for getting really high and yelling about peanut butter
A thong just fell out of my purse in front of my whole class maybe I should stop using this morning class as my walk of shame
He left cushions on my floor, chocolate on my bra and unexplained scratches on my thighs. I think this one might get a second date.
You proposed a left ass cheek firmness contest and got a surprising number of contestants. Then you ruined it by groping someone who wasn't playing and awarding them first place.
as a guy is it bad that even my mom called me easy?
you thought the best thing to say to him was "you aint no fuckin cop"
Randomize