She actually asked me 'is it in yet?' I deleted the vid.
just threw up in the bushes outside my lecture hall. sometimes i hate the freedom college gives you.
dude relax anyone of us could have gotten that girl pregnant
I told him that he could only go home with me if he didn't talk or tell me his name
She literally thanked me for asking before I put in her ass
I cant feel my face. Like I dont even know if I have one. I wish I had a helmet
I'm like 87% sure some random guy starting biting my ear after grinding me for like 30 seconds... I feel suprisingly unconcerned
My phone autocorrects "pooping" to "popping" and I'm like DO YOU EVEN KNOW ME??!
Just realized I've gone to court three different times with papers and a joint roller in my briefcase. #lawyeroftheyear
what's your room number? I've never been there sober...
30-degree weather + Metal Cockring Monday = really hard to pee.
Haha. I have resting bitch face. He has I want y'all to die face. It's a subtle difference
Glitter fights sound a lot funner in theory.
yeah, i thought because of the nature of his job he would have been better at it, but i guess there's a difference between a bagpipe and vagina
It was like I was gay for pay but except being gay I became straight and instead of for pay it was for coke.
Randomize