is it true that cum stays in you for 7 years?
that's gum
As my groomsman, I expect you to learn the Thriller dance with me before next September.
i just got cum up my nose. i would have expected more from the captain of the men's lacrosse team
Hey, I can't get ahold of Tommy. Let him know his ex-girlfriend is pregnant.
drunk taco night MLK would want it this way.
the fog machine set off the whole complexes fire alarm
Standing in a circle of girls fistpumping to the word "hospital" while taking shots.... I don't see this ending well, but its fucking fun.
Finished sriting an apology letter to my liver 2 weeks before st. Patricks game on
Come over, we're having a tea party. And by a tea party I mean we're drinking whiskey from tea cups.
I just stole a bunch of balloons from a birthday party and am giving one to each person at the bar.
HE HAS CHALLENGED MY BADNESS. I MUST CONQUER ALL THAT QUESTIONS MY POWER. BRING FORTH THE TIT PICS.
I am descending into that finals week rage fueled by ramen, mountain dew and bad sex is what's up.
A million fucking miles away, and the sun still manages to fuck my hungover mornings up.
I mean, I was going to use them for a beading project, but I guess I could take one and let you bat my dick around like a cat toy.
I lysoled the money\n(631): wrong text lmao
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