And surprisingly enough iPhone does not have an app for Russian mail order brides.
no, didnt close...
What?! she made the first move and invited you back to her place. thats like striking out in t-ball pathetic...
Just saw the first guy I gave head to lose in the french open...some how I feel better that my mistake made it to the same mistake as our relationship, the third round. Don't judge.
He practically bottle-fed me Jameson, like I was a baby chimpanzee on those nature specials.
This flask doesn't match my outfit. I hope the gays don't mind.
I was just on craigslist and saw and ad for a naked yoga instructor. I will no longer be jobless.
she blew me in the men's room in the restaurant. it was a french bistro, so it was okay
at what point did you think saran wrap was a better alternative to shoes?
Shits getting dirty between us in her dad's bedroom. I'm talking early millennium rap and r&b
We all have to be good at something. Mine are writing, drinking, fucking and peer pressure.
We had sex on the beach. I was completely naked except for my sneakers. That's when you know
Just Peed in a cup for my country. Fighting the good fight.
ANIME MEN ARE MAKING ME QUESTION MY SEXUALITY AGAIN
she passed out standing next to the car. her head hit the door so hard the alarm went off. she instantly snapped out of it and started sprinting away
Dude what happened last night?
I don't know, I'm still trying to figure out how I got my clothes back on.
Randomize
