I was debating whether her purse was real then I saw her puke in it.
What? Cold floors are soothing when you have a hangover. How am I supposed to pass that up. Even if I'm at my parents house
She fell asleep on the sidewalk and people starting using her as a hurdle
I'll bring the barf blanket just in case.
How do the freshmen here NOT understand the tricks we are playing on them by now? Doesn't bode well for grad numbers. Idiots.
Like it was the Mama Mia of shit shows. That bad.
the girl peeing in the stall next to mine has really cute shoes. on a scale of 1 to restraining order, how weird would it be to compliment them from in here?
I'm sorry but I have WAY too many sex/ hookup related bruises on visible areas to be going home tmrw
It feels like I'm being stabbed in the uterus with a rake. That night was totally worth it though. Thanks.
I just want to be able to run around naked and eat grass with no judgments and have people feed me and expect me to sleep all the time.
Just sucked some sandy dick on a boardwalk & now I'm at a family reunion hbu
I just want my paycheck, and my friends. And alcohol and tacos. Is that so much to ask?
I DID NOT GO INTO HOURS OF STRENUOUS LABOR FOR YOU TO LOOK LIKE A DOMINATRIX BARMAID ON A WEEKDAY. AT LEAST SAVE IT FOR THE WEEKEND GDI.
Can I get my morals surgically removed?
And our sex soundtracks thus far have been metal and Star Wars
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