Fun fact: he pulled out my nuva ring while he was fingering me.. he looked really confused at me and it a couple of times, so i just said "surprise! not only is it good for pleasure, it's also really handy for storing plastic toys." I'm thinking he's definately gonna call.
he started fingering my stomach rolls instead of my vag... am i really that fat?
I'm about to tackle a 10 year old off a sea doo
If a young child walked up to you and grabbed your penis, you'd feel violated too.
You love him. Dinosaurs. Math. Sex.
You poured your drink on yourself and then said "it's not a party until I'm wet"
My sister hid me from my parents, brought me a bloody mary, and told my girlfriend I was out with my dad. For 13, I got to say she's working out pretty good.
So to distract myself from jackies vomiting, im making up a story in my head. It's called the little penis that could
I wish there were birth control emojis
White people are beatboxing! Save me.
I would just like to point out that someone I had sex with drove me so I could have sex with you. I deserve some type of "most loyal booty call ever" award.
The extent of "getting it in" was this creepy guy sticking his finger in my bellybutton
They are stoned and trying to learn sign language together. It's like watching a chimp waving at itself in a mirror.
that game of battleshots got way too fucking intense. why does the couch have burn marks now.
In my life time, I want nothing more than to get a blow job while watching Space Jam.
Randomize
