At least I can take solace in the fact that with 8 billion some odd people in the world, at least one of them is shitting in their own car right now.
I'm having a terrible night. Can I sleep over?
Too tired to pretend that I care : (
it's a well known fact that sluts are attracted to bright colors
american apparel?
try lime green
she was throwing up and singing "I HAD a feeling that tonight was going to be a good good night." And yeah she was still in her dress.
By the third Id pass back i figured the bouncer had fucked one of us.
He wouldn't give me a cup of water for my bong so i sat in the drive thru to run up the timer until he gave it to me.
I knew it was a good Wednesday night when I woke up tucked in to NOT my own bed with my beer helmet, an empty bottle of Jose, and a trash can placed in front of my face.. Happy 20th!
She was touching herself and looking a shoes online. My debt is bad enough without bringing that hot mess into my life.
As i was laying there shouting that he dislocated my hip he actually reached his armed around and patted himself on the back
preface to our conversation: my vagina hurts.
Just bc you put "its cute" at the end of it doesn't change the fact that u have called me a vag twice this morning and its only 10:03
I just smoked a joint and ate a sandwich while watching someone get arrested. Bonnaroo is a silly place.
I spent all the money my grandpa gave me for Christmas last night….solid start to 2015
I came so hard I went blind for a few seconds.
Only I would get an underage 24 hours before turning 21.
Randomize
