i jus pukd everywherw but i took a showr, come cuddle
he was writing an apology letter to his liver in shakespearean english... That much fun...
He googled "how long will i be drunk" and just started crying
Don't get the hula weed. It makes you sleep walk in destructive and confusing ways. I'll explain on Saturday.
I just walked by a party bus on my way to study. God hates me.
Word is he has some crazy hawaiian STD
he went up stairs with nothing on but calvin klein's and an eskimo hat, said hi to her dad, got a doughnut, and left like it was an everyday thing
Struggs. It's also 90 degrees out but I'm not sure I can feel heat or cold any more. Too hungover.
God damn. I'm really starting to resent babies. They're everywhere. Like fucking land mines.
The sex was so good I went temporarily numb. Slightly embarrassing when she pointed out I was kissing my own arm.
Im the macgyver of cooling down beers. The toilet tank was blocked so I couldn't use it.....
I was to tired to jerk him off, so he made me hold it while he thrusted into my hand.
Well his dad is my dentist so they've both been in my mouth.
So who left their underwear on a lamppost in my aunt's backyard
Well I only snuggle him I don't hump him. That's rude.
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