it was so cute when you were pretending to have willpower
so this guy comes in from the patio covered in puke and says "we gotta go"...Yup u need to go is an understatement
Fat spanish girl grinding against air conditioner. ive seen everything now
Im drunk and they're making me play quiet game. Im scared. Baptists are here
congratulations to me i think I am on the road to legitimate alcoholism
cool. same. I'm in class drinking
NOT OKAY
sorry for partying
THATS NOT PARTYING THATS DRINKING IN CLASS
Please delete that video of me blowing you. I will repay you with 100 blowjobs even better than the one I gave you during that video. Please. I am gonna be a grandma one day.
I woke up with the Dorothy costume at my ankles, both sparkly red shoes on, and clutching ToTo....we're not in Kansas anymore, dude
Can you pick up from work today? There's a surprise for you on the bed and I haven't gone blind which is positive.
I unknowingly motorboated my boyfriend's ex-gf last night. Yay me!
You rope them in with the looks and the boobs, and I'll bore them into submission with random trivia. We can't lose.
Wow! It's so great to hear from you! We all thought you perished in Winepocalypse 2012, man.
I just noticed that pic of your cock has a Christmas tree in the background. It's July.
I'm actually kinda upset that we didn't consider velcro-ing detachable capes to our clothes before this moment.
i think im in europe. pls send help
We broke the bed while I was handcuffed to the headboard and let's just say that was a hard one to explain to the RA
Randomize
