First off: I'm drunk so fuck you. Second: you weren't a bad girlfriend. Tres: thats 3 in spanish. Number 4: fuck 3 Doors Down
okay im going to go eat, shower and find underwear... call if you want.... but ill be listenig to glee VERY loudly.
I woke up on the steps beside a plate of spaghetti and a toilet paper roll ripped in half. And i actually think this day is gonna get better.
I mean this holiday was built on cheap beer, shitty whisky, and processed meat... and I fully plan to honor that
you called me and cried until i agreed to record a rap about our lives with you
Made it home ok. Only got hit by one car.
VODKAVODKAVODKAYESSSS
After he came all he could say was how great the lighting fixtures where in my apartment.
She kept sniffing my sweater and tried to guess what type of detergent I use.
That's all? I'm a pro at gay chicken. I'll touch his dick, I have no problem with that.
Haha, apparently they frown upon male strippers there. Bouncers couldn't catch me tho.
HELP THE ONLY THING THAT'S HELPING ME DISTINGUISH BETWEEN THE TWO OF THEM IS THE DIRECTION OF THEIR WINKY FACES OMFG
I'm sorry I keep having sex wth your friends. I'm done, for real. Unless cole is interested. Other than that, I'm done.
This is a question I thought I'd never have to ask. How many hits of acid did you give your dad tonight?
Certain restrictions may apply. Common side effects of sex with me include unbridled joy, a healthy glow, soreness and the inability to walk for short to long amounts of time. If any of these side effects occur please consult your physician, so he/she can prescribe me a "high-five".
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