Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
when you find your car can you pick me up? his mom is here and im hungover
people would bow to what i just did to her vagina
Now I have to picture Dave Letterman having sex with all these women. Im the real victim.
Are you for fucking real.? He divorced me just because he got a fucking girlfriend.?!
You are two creepy Justin Bieber quotes away from me not talking to you for the rest of the day
If I had a pelvic thrust emoticon, I would use it
There needs to be waaaay more alcohol in my apartment if I am going to survive being unemployed
That girl that gave me a blowjob, I think I fired her last year.
That's not how these arrangements work. You don't buy each other stuff unless you break a sex toy. End of story.
if you need to find her look her up on www.imastupidslut.org
.org?
yeah. they're non profit. helps them sleep at night.
Whoever owns the butter that i always steal out of the office fridge definitely put THC butter in there this time. Shit just got real.
What exactly do I say to a random stoner hookup to thank him for ending my dry spell? Is it awkward to just say "Thanks for that. It was well needed."
But Keith is doing MDMA for New Years and he's 39.
Keith has a beautiful 20 year old girlfriend, a good job and a cute puppy. We can't all be Keith.
But I want to be Keith.
In the last 3 weeks my drunken adventures have caused me to lose 2 credit cards, one debit card, a bracelet, two purses, and my $500 phone... Maybe i should quit drinking.
dude, totally just walked home...using pizza as gloves
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