i bet jesus would rush if he went to usc
you tried to pee on a squirrel and everyone saw. you've got some serious untagging to do
Trying to figure out if I'm the second dude she hooked up with yesterday. I feel like a consolation prize
I'm just gonna be the bigger person here and say I want you inside me
the tile , carpet , walls , cabinets , even the ceiling ... there is Jello everywhere
it was your idea to have indoor Jello wrestling man
she just pulled a hulk hogan to make her point. no idea how it helped
Just because I tried to backhand you with a fist full of cash does not make me violent
The last thing I remember is your grandma calling me a pussy and taking my shot for me. Your family is awesome.
Listen. You seriously only live once... there aren't that many cinco de mayos left until someone knocks u up and u have to have a shotgun wedding. Man up.
he told me while inside me and mid thrust that he's dreamed of that moment since high school... awkward
I was behind him snuggling, I told him I was the big spoon and he told me I was too little it was more like he was wearing a backpack.
I hooked up with a blind guy last night... he's clapping in order to find his way around our apartment
I think I've had more sex in your bed than you have and I've only been here three days
why the hell are you crying over taco bell?
I ate at the cafeteria for the first time yesterday and today I think I had an hour long fart.
Randomize
