I think we need to take a brake
What upsets me the most about that is that you spelt it 'brake'
He seems like he has feelings, which is completely unacceptable; esp for a boy in college.
He said we were driving the golf cart through the woods screaming 'iceroad truckers' for four hours in the dark
make sure i look cute passed out on the couch.
spending the week with her family was quite possibly the longest ive ever gone without having a boner
he mailed me a thank you note for the blowjob.
george bush was a better president for first pitches than barack obama. there. i said it.
One minute we were getting noise complainted by the security guards the next I was shotgunning a beer with them
In an m&m suit playing manhunt drunk. And you thought you werent guna have a good time
I know. You don't know poor life choice until your sitting on the floor of a community bathroom waiting to vomit at 4 am
I just canoed to the bar. I am a skilled drunk paddler.
He led me to his room and handed me the remote, he left to go take a shower and there is a group of guys across the hall just staring at me... Its like they know something i dont. Help me.
I was giving this guy head and he stopped me to look me in the eyes and say "you have a gift"
sriracha body shots, that's gonna be a thing
it's like you just said "i want you to suffer"
Do we have to do this party tonight? I'm worried my bed will miss me...
Randomize
