so the sex was amazing up until the point where she said "wow, you're even better than your dad!"
i just picked a peanut m&m up off the floor. with my toes. and then proceeded to eat it.
and he thought i came like four times in 2 mins. my leg just kept cramping up
Is it bad when your hot neighbor is crying on her porch, and your 2nd thought is "maybe her boyfriend cheated on her and she'll want to fuck me for revenge sex?"
Perfectly normal.
i'm moving back early just in case the freshmen need a tour of the school
oh right the one that ends on your bed
True bitches know their best friends favorite Boones Farm flavor.
WHY IN THE FUCK DID YOU LET ME DRUNK PUNCH STEVE? HE IS SUCH A NICE GUY!
I can't believe she made out with my 15 year old brother. That kid can seriously pull.
Is it just me or does the sex still keep getting better? I wasn't crying, my eyes just watered from how hard I was cumming.
what compelled you to fill her bra with pudding and freeze it in the first place?
i might remember if i didn't get knocked out with it later that day.
You threw a shot glass at the bartender and still managed to convince him to let us drink more. You are my hero.
He was peeing on the back wall of a building. He would have been okay if the building hadn't been a police station.
I convinced her that there were two p's in Chipotle - the 2nd one was silent.
Full body rubs, head scratches, foot rubs, massages, a penis that is able to get hard whenever you want it. I mean ive got a lot to offer
He showed up at my house with roses and a bottle of vodka... to watch a movie. obvi i took the vodka and didn't sleep with him
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