I feel like if im whacking off more now that i have a gf than i did when i was single, somethings wrong.
This ain't no lie cnn says sonny n cher's dtr chastity is going to have sex reassignment surgery to become a man named chaz
Not surprised. I always thought Cher was a very passable post op transexual.
His penis has a special gift of curing my broken heart
You kept making that girl eat peanuts, saying they were good for her baby..... I don't think she pregnant
like he couldn't stop by and throw me in the back seat and ask for a blowjob? he had to give me flowers?
Waking up with a sore back because you put the team on it for jager pong all night
I was more obsessed with the sweat stain on her back that was simultaneously shaped like a vagina and the virgin Mary.
apparently i tried to facetime the drunk bus last night, that's probably why we had to walk back to campus
Drunk ass.
You are the tramp this city needs, but not the one it deserves.
I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but a penn state hat. We are....
I feel like I should acknowledge that I see you as a human and not a ragdoll sex object
They already have a joint checking account. She's got his balls in her purse! What's next, a shared Facebook account?
I'm actually glad the whole thing's over now. It's exhausting to fake a pregnancy.
Imagine not having to fake it.
Yeah, I should never have kids, probably.
Yesterday I febreezed my bed in between gentleman callers
On a scale of one to 10 how Risky is it to sleep with a married man (all morals set aside)
Randomize
