Why. Ill be the rabbit if ull be the carrot.
My professor just used "labia" and "numchucks" in the same sentence. I am dying.
Just interrupted a freshman tour to ask where the sexual health center is. Figured I'd just give us all what we were really looking for.
I woke up this morning next to a stack of saltines & a txt from u saying "do it." it took me a second to remember wat was going on
got into a fight with a bouncer over who's moustache is better again last night...
I think the tooth fairy visited me last night... after I chipped my tooth n blacked out, I woke up to my purse filled with cocaine n sequins.
I wish you'd make everyone's lives easier and do him already. Then we can get rid of him.
By the power invested in me, I now pronounce your taco to be meaty. Meaty taco meaty taco meaty meaty meaty taco.
She's the one that asked you what my favorite color was & handed you a piece of bacon
One huge ass giant mistake followed by celebatory shots and coors lights thats my day in a nut shell
When / where did the additional couches appear?
Additional?
James brought one with him when he showed up. Theres still 2 outside and according to facebook, at least one more burned up.
And the cockring thing wasn't sexual.
I forgot to ask you how long you're housesitting. By which I mean how many bones can I get in averaging 2.5 bones per day.
20.
So my new thing apparently is getting wasted, showing people my slytherin socks and convincing them I'm slytherin..because why not
You have the perkiest tits in all of North America. You're fine.
Randomize
