Tell LD happy birthday and party like it's $19.99
Recession joke.
office poll is still running 100% that Spencer Pratt is more disturbing than David Carradine's death
Am I the only person who thinks Megan Fox looks totally like a Thai lady boy with a serious tanning bed fix?
He was from Iceland of course I didnt sleep with him, havent you seen Mighty Ducks 2???
I'm wearing this super skanky ass dress that's wayyy to slutty for church but I think Jesus will appreciate it because i look so bangin for his bday.
well he is only 50 percent black.. but after last night i am 100 percent not going back
I honestly can't remember your justification for putting peanut butter on your cell phone.
Where the hell did all of these gingers come from? It's like they crawled out of their shame-caves for st Patrick's day.
Worst part of blacking out... Waking up and having to do the teeth check
Just played slippy cup. Flip cup plus slip n slide. What did you do with your fourth of july?
Every time I see him I get horny. I can't help it!
Just stop. You're making other wives look bad. We are all starting to hate you.
I did not get laid last night bc my condoms were too small. I'm allowed to be dreary
We'll just charge in there, all pant less and fabulous demanding he give back her ferret.
No matter how long you've been away, there's nothing quite like pooping at your parents' house
I told him I had the birth control implant in my arm and he looked me in the eyes, said "Science!" and came in me
Randomize
