can a staight man not wear seersucker in this town?
Dude michael jackson died, guess he's not 'stayin aliveee' any longer.
Uh dude that wasn't a michael jackson song it was the BGs
Day two of vacation and my first drink of the day is a plan b colada
Drinking Grey Goose on the toilet. Don't make me graduate.
I'm hoping to finish this bottle of wine before I pass out, I don't want the remainder spilling on my white down comforter.
definitely not taking the whole return culture shock so well...drinking a 100 proof rootbeer vodka float out of a german beer mass
im sober
you just pulled your sweatpants out of your bag and thanked them for being alive
have to get expensive furniture. after that study abroad now at least six things at ikea are named after guys i slept with
I show up hung over with mcdonalds. Why wouldn't he have sex with me? It's a fucking leap year...
An don't say it's "personal preference" cause I don't buy it. I just want to have normal cool guy balls. I don't want to be the dude that's still rocking the equivalent of the "mid 90's bowl cut" of scrotum haircuts.
I had 17 beers 2 days ago. I'm not dad material yet
WHY WOULD YOU SWIPE RIGHT???!!!!!
The same reason I ordered and ate almost an entire pizza last night
She referred to my balls as rotund and handsome
You -do- realize there are other things to talk about than just how different parts of you smell like pussy, right?
Last night I ate a candle out of a strippers ass.... I guess it was an okay night.
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