Thats not how I planned it, its just the way she passed out
I had a dream you and I were having sex. It was pretty romantic.... until you started pulling out toys.
How do you feel about the band name "O'labia Newton John"??
I just saw what sperm look like swimming around. I'm not happy with what you've put in my stomach.
Just shaved my vagina. It's been so long I forgot what it looked like. You need to come over right now.
We saw a kid playing in poison ivy. We walked away, he'll learn his lesson.
When I woke up in the parking lot today I decided it is not a good idea to hang out with you anymore.
i'm not the one sitting naked in my room playing with my boobs and a cat.
you set the microwave for an hour telling me that the done sound was your alarm.
Come on. I'll make you hot pockets. Literally and sexually.
She had one unshaved part on her vagina that she called "the soul patch" I just didn't know what to think
come over we're fb stalking guys who were dressed as bananas last night because i can't remember which one i blew
...Just hit my fuck buddy with my car.
Why in the hell is there a guy dressed up as a horse passed out in our kitchen.
happy birthday!
The strippers who live across the street set up a decently professional stage on their front balcony and a banner for a go fund me... I think we're gonna get a show.
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