Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(805): View more from California

Fiestas. Its like a classier verson of mardi gras.

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(502): View more from Kentucky

i really wish someone from a royal background would fuck me so i could literally say i was 'royally fucked'.

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(203): View more from Connecticut

his dick got so hard in his pants and it broke his zipper

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(973): View more from New Jersey

my credit card is covered in vodka and bad memories

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(734): View more from Michigan

Yeah I'm gunna date him. I figure its regular sex and maybe feelings will come in time...it worked for arranged marriages...

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(708): View more from Illinois

I still love him regardless of his misguided forays into heterosexuality

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(305): View more from Florida

Its fiiine, tuesday is like the thursday of wine wednesday. And i mean, free beer for girls at the grove...im not NOT gonna take that offer up!

(216): View more from Ohio

Look at your life. Look at your choices.

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(319): View more from Iowa

I broke a glass at the bar and ended up with blood on my forehead. I apparently kept screaming BLOOD like the little boy in that YouTube video.

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(647): View more from Ontario

From now on he's gonna have to shave first. It feels like I got eaten out by a chainsaw!

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