In a few years, 50 babies 50 states. Like it?
He lets me throw up in him even if i do it mistakeily- erica talking about the toilet
what if every blade of grass was a penis?
woke up to an unread text message i sent to myself: "brreakfdast..pork and ice cream."
Then you started screaming that this was the first time you did e and that you had a 4.8 gpa, that was right before you almost suffocated between that one girl's tits.
Sorority life is like alcoholic girl scouts, plus douchebags in polos.
we were sitting on his couch watching tv and laughing at how funny the voices on the commercial were, then we realized the volume wasn't on.
Like lay upon bear skin rugs, drink brandy and reminisce of the yesteryear's before a majestic fire place? Because those are my plans.
While I was fucking him, he grabbed a taco off his shelf and started eating it. I had taco dripped on me. I have no idea where the taco came from.
Been awake for 50 some odd hours. I've discovered I can spew out maaaad papers whilst coked out of my face. My roommates probably think I'm dead. Money well spent. You?
I guess that's what I get for clicking on a link that says clown penis.
Any chance the bar is open now? Also who's wedding is this?
You just kept telling everyone to call you MFT.. Mother Fucking Tornado.
No I didn't say it was safe, I said it was legal. I didn't say anything about it being safe. It's not my fault if you weren't listening properly.
So...I know we have a conversation later this week. But one of the key things I want to know is if I can specify having my body mummified and buried in Egypt (or at least nearby the Luxor in Vegas). How much money do you think that would cost? Do I need to increase my life insurance policy?
Randomize
