My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
creepy.
OMG I just tried to text you something dirty but accidentally texted the obama campaign
I just put my retainer in and it tastes like weed
I fuked that chick last night and she kept saying, "oh...oh....oh", like Bill Lumberg
so what did you do?
I did the mash I did the monster mash It was a graveyard smash!
I just fell for a fake 50 dollar bill in a urinal. Fuck pittsburgh
even iPhones love lady gaga. everytime I type haha it trys to correct it to gaga. this is bullshit...
Just TALKING to him is better than banging my bf, imagine what actual banging will be like.
i don't think i ever formally apologized for that time i threw up on your dog.... well...here it is...
five cans of playdoh and a game of guess whose penis ...
So much to do, haven't done anything except hook up with sailors and work on my tan.
I don't even fuck like that, he just happened to be in the right place at the right drunk.
In the pie chart of my life, she is a huge part of why I drink.
You decided it was too difficult to walk down the stairs so you just rolled across his kitchen floor laughing like a maniac and trying to drink at the same time
So I just stirred my shower drink with my razor.
I'm not going to ask which end you used.
Give me the sexing that I truly desire and I will reveal to you the mysterious location of the PBR's
Randomize
