im pretty sure i just saw someone trying to catch a fish with his penis
I'm fucking him on the second date. I don't give a fuck what Patti Stanger says.
Now I know how you felt every time you had to listen to me have sex with a girl... mildly disguested yet marginally proud.
And surprisingly enough iPhone does not have an app for Russian mail order brides.
I have no idea how I got home or why I am naked but I assume I owe you a thank you...
We waved. But it was a "let's hook up" wave.
I knew from the second he called his penis glorious that I was meant to sleep with him
Your mother liked my album on facebook that's only filled with drunk pictures. I don't know what to feel about this
I can't get over how you look like his sister and he wants to fuck you.
Dude he's moving to fucking Germany now. What is it about your vagina that makes men want to flee the continent?
She answered the door wearing a basket, said it was the only clean thing she had.
look when god gives you a dick that good for his son's birthday you don't question it
I fucked him on shrooms. His dick looked like a missile and he had snakes coming out of his ears. It. Was. AWESOME!
i dunno but you just looked at him said "youre making me really wet" and straight pissed your pants
is caitlin alive?
ya she's alive she's watching a movie
ok remind her she drank toilet water then.
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