lol you are funny thanks bro I'll take you to a strip club
I don't wanna go to a strip club I'd rather get my boobs free or earn them from a series of good deeds
Ha! What's wrong with that? Hard work deserves compensation. I accept cash, checks, and boobies!
Midget Michael Jackson impersonator dancing to Beat it in Penn Station almost caused me to miss my train. God, I
OMG MY MOM JUST ASKED IF I WAS GETTING PAP SMEAR TOMORROW VERY LOUDLY WHILE WE ARE STANDING IN A VERY PUBLIC LINE.
i was having this nice romantic moment with my girlfriend. then jimmy came in and peed on the fridge
the dude from the bar called to tell his mom about me immediately after we finished PLEASE COME GET ME
Yeah well margarita Wednesday already came twice this week and it's just now Wednesday
This is going to be BYOBM Vegas trip: Bring Your Own Bail Money.
Duuuude. Everything is so brilliant right now. This frosting is freaking orgasmic.
It's vanilla, man. Accept no substitutes. There are so many t's in that word.
I don't care who it's from we're getting blown. It's a 3 day weekend anything can happen
Just googled "penis wearing a hat" i think it's safe to say nobody found my ex's lost phone...
If by "Are you high?" u mean "Did you just pass out at Genghis Grill walking to your table and falceplant?" the answer is yes.
What's the address and code again...does anyone need anything and why is my viking helmet on the bed?
Doug will be the one to get my vagina. I don't know when or how but I'm now declaring that it is his. And he better not disappoint.
I just shaved my pubes into a heart shape. if that doesn't scream romantic idk what does
But no. So do not give him one damn penny. Unless they are in a sock and you are hitting him with it.
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