One thing i hate about playoff baseball: George Lopez
It's a Lindsey's Going to Jail Theme party.
Get in the lobby, you have to sign my boxers
there are some nice people on this island. free ride free pancakes and they even prayed for us when they dropped us off
he actually managed to pick a girl up by telling her that her skirt was ugly and she didnt do a good job with her makeup. thats some seriously low selfesteem
I need to find a more grown up way of dealin with a hangover at the office than pringles and mountain dew at 8:30 am...
You asked him for a membership to him and his dick.
I inhaled my own vomit, how was your night?
I have invented a new game to play on campus. It's called "Mormons or Pledges?" It's fantastic.
If I died tonight, I'd be content knowing you were the last person to see my boobs.
He literally lured me in the house with his cat then we ended up fucking on the living room couch while the cat just sat there and watched
Yeah bc that's when u should take a Molly. At a house party with everyone from ur hometown
why did i wake up in the bathroom?
we had to stay with you a while until we convinced you it wasn't safe to wash your face, then you fell asleep with your foot in the toilet.
Be there in 20. Want icecream?
sex. I want sex. I like where your heads at though.
I just saw a chick driving drinking a juice box smoking all while on the phone that is talent
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