Yea, forget your mom. She will be home after her one night stand.
im going to forcibly insert an angry corn snake into his urethra
omg. why did you never tell me how amazing shitting and smoking is?
i thought this knowledge was automatically promulgated at the age of eighteen?
i just got fired from my job because i was "too smart" and my immedate response was i am WAY too stoned to be considered smart, and theni walked out the door.
wow. i have no words.
im glad we only fight about serious things like the hills and disney scene it
im probably the most hungover person watchin icarly right now
I legitimately sent him a storybook of naked pictures.
you pulled down your pants to convince a girl you were god
So apparently I ended up throwing my clothes in the toilet after getting kicked out of TQ and ran around the neighborhood in my boxers. Works gonna suck hard once this hangover kicks in. Also: I lost a shoe so looks like flipflops for the rest of winter
also somebody did cough syrup and i was really worried but i couldn’t express why properly so i was like MACKLEMORE SAYS NO
Went to put my shoe on and asked myself why I left a sock in it. I didn't. Needless to say I found our used condom.
There's no time frame.
For drinking wine out of the bottle and taking nyquil at 9 AM? There probably should be.
I'm literally naked with a whole pizza in my lap sitting in my chair.
I think next time I give head I'm gonna try making the chewbacca noise.
I look forward to it
friends who go to the bar together leave the bar together and im not leaving you behind ohana means family
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