She recited Pi throughout ever orgasm she had....she said it was a game she likes to play...how far she gets is how she judges her lovers...I am oddly turned on by this...
I think I should just go up to him and say, "before I invest time in this could I just take a look at your penis?"
Woke up to the first three complete chapters of my new novel titled "If My Dick Could Talk" waiting for me on my laptop
We need to play Chardee MacDennis. Contact me when you have an available date. This is not a question.
Also, you peed on your hand last night. Id just like to point that out
YOU WERE HAVING SEX IN THE SAME BED I WAS SLEEPING IN. AND YOU GRABBED MY HAIR. OF COURSE I'M PISSED.
He came over drunk in a speedo i told him he has my vote he said who are you voting for when i said obama he took off running and shouting i was worthless like an empty beer can
Blah blah blah. Just come home and put a baby in me.
I also have to vacuum the broken noodles out of my suitcase...
steve's beating me 4-2 in our "sexually confusing straight people" competition. steve is a wizard. this is not a drill.
Regardless of how one feels after a break up, whiskey must be consumed.
well i don't know if 30 seconds is exactly a good time but at least he bought me breakfast
I just found (and ate) a chunk of a reese's that fell between my boobs. Problem is that I finished those off 3 days ago in a drunk induced sob session... Has it really been that long since I changed my clothes?!
I hate political talk. I just wanna get fucked into an alternate universe where Bernie Sanders is president.
I saw that he had a tattoo of a map of New Jersey on his arm, so i slowed down to like 20mph and pushed him out of the car
Randomize
